Reality Check

Well it happened. I knew it would sooner or later (obviously, I'd hoped it'd be later), but Peyton had a run-in with some playground bullies yesterday at school. As I walked in to pick Peyton up after school there was the principal...she'd clearly been waiting for me. She pulled me in to the office and explained the situation. Apparently there were these two girls that Peyton has taken a liking to. The principal wasn't exactly sure if Peyton was playing with them or if she was wanting to play with them, but as Peyton's para watched from a short distance these two girls decided they didn't want to play with Peyton. Rather than simply saying to her, "We're all done playing with you" or, "We're playing with someone else", they decided a better option was to line up side-by-side and shove Peyton to the ground. The para witnessed it all and said it wasn't an accident and was obviously intentional. She went running over to see if Peyton was okay (which she was) and she heard Peyton saying to the girls, "You need to say sorry - that's not nice!" in a sad voice as she laid on the ground (Yay, Peyton, for sticking up for yourself verbally!). The girls were escorted inside to the principal's office and the incident was dealt with. They were also walked down to Peyton's classroom later on in the day where they pulled Peyton out in the hallway so the girls could apologize. Overall, the situation was dealt with extremely well. But it still made my heart ache hearing about it...and the "mama bear" in me initially wanted to go find those little twerps and set them straight (yes, I know they're only kindergarteners).

As I drove Peyton to therapy after school we talked a little bit and our conversation went something like this:

Me: So how was your day at school?
Peyton: Good.
Me: Did you learn anything fun?
Peyton: I don't know...maybe something.
Me: Did you get to play with friends today?
Peyton: Yes, some friends not nice to me.
Me: Uh oh, what happened?
Peyton: I wanna play tag with Lexi.
Me: Then what happened?
Peyton: She say she no wanna play with me...she pushed me down. I was sad.
Me: What did you do then?
Peyton: I be sad.
Me: Did anyone help you?
Peyton: Miss Jayne help me stand up and find more friends.
Me: What happened to Lexi?
Peyton: She go in time out - can't play outside.
Me: So what did you do at recess after that happened?
Peyton: I play in the snow...wanna play with more friends.
Me: Did anything else happen at school?
Peyton: Lexi say "Sorry" in the hallway. I was sad. She not being nice to me.
Me: Well, she just made a bad choice...I'm sure she's a nice girl.
Peyton: No wanna fall down again.
Me: I know. If that happens again you just make sure and tell a teacher, okay?
Peyton: I was mad, too.
Me: Well, that's okay to feel sad and mad if someone does something mean to you. But do you ever push them back?
Peyton: No. Wanna be a nice friend. I play with Lexi again?
Me: We'll see...

After our conversation I think I was even more upset than when the principal first told me about it. Hearing Peyton talk about it just made it a lot more "real". And I'm sure some of you who are reading this may be thinking, "Oh brother, every kid gets pushed down at one time or another...this really isn't that big of a deal". Most "typical" kids don't have to listen to the little comments day-in and day-out like, "she talks like a baby" or, "why can't she talk right?" or, "you can't go to school because you can't talk", and they don't have people gawking at them everywhere they go because of how they talk or how they react when they get excited about something (yes, I realize Peyton has no volume control...she's stuck on LOUD)...and I know I'm probably way more sensitive about the comments and the stares than Peyton is. I've come to realize that's just part of being different, unfortunately. So the ignorant comments and stares (from both kids and adults), I can handle...or I should say, I'm learning to handle, but when someone is downright mean, that's a little different. So I'm really trying to NOT make this a big deal and to make this more of a learning experience both for Peyton and myself.

As I said earlier, when I first heard about the situation I wanted to go find those little snot-faced brats and give them a good chewing out. But the more I've thought about it and have talked with Peyton about it (which we've tried to not make a big deal about - we just wanted her to know it's okay to talk about things like this if something happens at school), my mindset has turned from being angry at these kids to realizing being angry isn't going to solve anything...what I should really be doing is praying for these girls so that this type of situation doesn't happen again. Who knows, this could be God's way of teaching these girls that they need to think before they act...and if they were indeed being cruel to Peyton because they didn't want to play with her, maybe they need to take the time to get to know someone before automatically writing them off. Wow, deep for kindergarteners, I know, but still, I'll be praying for these girls and for Peyton that she'll be spared of potential situations like this in the future...and more importantly, that I'll give grace to the offenders the next time something happens. Funny how God uses such a wide variety of situations to teach us things. Love you, Peyton, and I'm proud of you for not getting upset and reacting inappropriately towards those girls! You're a very, very special girl!!

Merry Christmas . . . I need therapy

For some reason I have this thing where I just CAN'T bring myself to pay money for Christmas cards...pre-designed Christmas cards, that is. Call me crazy, but I just can't. This year I even have a $100 gift certificate for Tiny Prints that I won off a blog and I just could NOT bring myself to pay for a design. Probably because I've had this idea in my head for our family Christmas card since like June. And even when I DO see a cute design on a website I still have this little voice in my head saying "You can't pay that much per card when you could design your OWN!!!". Ridiculous, I know. Anyway, I finally got my idea all polished up and put together this afternoon, so Merry Christmas from the Libbys...enjoy our custom-designed card. LOL!!

READING!!!

Well, once again, I've been forced to eat my words. Several months ago as Chad and I were talking about Peyton entering a mainstream all-day kindergarten class we were talking about what reasonable expectations were for Peyton given her disability. I distinctly remember saying, "Well, I certainly don't think reading will come during kindergarten for her...it didn't for me!". *GULP!* Just ate those words...Peyton has been coming home with little books to read for homework a couple of times per week. At first she was excited about doing her homework, but then the novelty wore off. She fought doing homework unless it was on her terms, which was a bit frustrating. But then the past week or so she's really been wanting to work on her homework. Last night she did AWESOME reading her book!!! Watching her made me want to jump up and down screaming "WAY TO GO, PEYTON & YAY GOD!!!!" (and THANK YOU to all the teachers/paras/therapists/family/friends who have helped her get to this point!!). I realize this is just the beginning of what, realistically, will be a long road through school, but we're gonna take every chance we can to celebrate each step Peyton takes...even if it seems small and insignificant to some people. Keep up the GREAT work Peyton - we love you!!



(Sorry about Carson's added "bathroom noises")

Beautiful

This morning I overheard Carson say to Peyton "You're so beautiful!" as she came walking downstairs in her mismatched outfit she'd put on. I smiled and was once again reminded just how thankful I am for my two little sweeties. Then a friend sent me a link to a video this morning, and of course, I bawled thinking back to Carson's comment this morning...crazy how God ties things together like this. Yesterday I was talking with my friend Amy about how the world often views having a child with special needs as a "burden", when in fact, it's such a blessing because God uses them to teach us SO many things that we otherwise would have overlooked or missed out on. Some food for thought - Enjoy!

A Day in the Life of Peyton

Some of you have probably heard me talk about how Peyton's not always the most forthcoming about what she did at school...typically we find out what her day was like by her re-enacting the day as she's playing. Well last night I caught pretty much her WHOLE day on video - from Mrs. Ward (Kindergarten teacher), to Mr. Rothweiler (Adaptive Phy. Ed. Teacher), to Mrs. Hathaway (Music Teacher), to Mr. Fischer (Phy. Ed. Teacher), to Mrs. Welker (Special Ed Teacher), then back to Mrs. Ward during free choice time before getting on the bus, arriving home after dropping her friend Will off at home (she "drives him home" on the bus) and then being Grandma Julie making mac 'n cheese for dinner. Gotta love it! Anytime she's "in charge" she comes alive, so enjoy these clips...hopefully you can make out some of what she's saying (and hopefully my giggling isn't too distracting...oh, and her 'lil plumbers crack - guess those pants are a bit too big still).

An Eye Opener

Last night I caught the end of one of my new favorite shows, Parenthood. One of the reasons I love this show so much is because a couple of the main characters have an autistic son, and I feel like the writers do an amazing job showing "real-life" situations relating to challenges parents/families face. Well last night's episode showed Adam & Krista (parents to Max, who has Asperger's - a "high functioning" form of Autism) trying to fit in time for a date. Things kept coming up and they worked through one roadblock after another. At one point Krista said as they were discussing when they could get away just the two of them, "Oh my gosh, we're going to become a statistic!!". They finally scheduled a time to go out to dinner just the two of them, but then the "date" ended up in an awkward situation at the restaurant where they ended up sharing a table with people they ran in to and were seated right next to (turned out to be Adam's sister and a guy she was out with who works for Adam - awkward). Not exactly the "alone time" they were looking for and desperately needed. The next evening they had an extended family celebration for their daughter who had been elected to the Student Council and after they ate dinner realized, "SHOOT, we forgot the cake!". So Krista & Adam ran to the store to pick up the cake...the show ended with a shot of the two of them sitting parked alongside a neighborhood street laughing, eating the cake - just the two of them. I couldn't help but smile seeing that. It wasn't a romantic setting that most people would envision for a "date", but for them it was perfect - some time to reconnect and laugh together. Made me realize how fortunate Chad and I are to have so many wonderful friends and family who are willing to help out so the two of us are able to have some time to catch up and not feel like we're each living our own separate lives over the course of each busy week. And it was also a great reminder to not wait around for the perfect setting to enjoy some time together...even if it's sitting in the backyard around the campfire just the two of us or sitting on the couch in a stupor after the kids are in bed. Make the most of it!

Making the Connection

Last night as I was reading bible stories with Carson at bedtime we were talking about Moses. Carson asked why Moses didn't talk. I was a little confused because it hadn't mentioned anything in the story we'd read about that, and then he said "Cause Mom, that story I heard at church said Aaron talked for Moses". I always knew he was a smart little thing, but I guess it surprised me that he remembered a detail like that from who knows how long ago. We talked a bit and I explained that God sent Aaron with Moses to help him because Moses sometimes had a hard time using his words and speaking so people could understand him. Carson piped up, "Kind of like Peyton...but I help her like Aaron helped Moses". I sat there trying to process the range of emotions I was feeling...and trying even harder to hold back my tears. Initially my heart sank that Carson finally had come to realize (or was at least verbalizing) that Peyton was "different" than most other kids. We've always talked to him about how everyone learns at different times and that Peyton is "still learning to talk". As much as my heart ached hearing Carson acknowledge Peyton's speech difficulties, I have to say I was so proud to see him make the connection between the bible story he'd heard and him helping Peyton. We had a wonderful conversation about how God doesn't care how well you can talk or how tall you are or whether or not you're good at sports, what He cares about is what's in your heart. And we also had a great talk about being a good friend to others because that's the best way for them to see that you have Jesus in your heart. As Carson drifted off to sleep he said to me, "Mom, I'm glad I have Jesus in my heart and I'm going to tell my friend Brady he can have Jesus in HIS heart, too". Just another "proud mama" moment...love you little buddy!

Tasty Thursdays – Easy Baked Mac 'n Cheese

Well folks, I'm sure you're all SHOCKED, but I'm going to attempt to throw up a few more "Tasty Thursday" recipes. Can't promise it'll be every week, but in an effort to get myself better organized in the cooking department, I'm setting up my recipes (existing and new ones I come across) in this fun recipe card format that I (and you!!) can print out and throw in my handy dandy cookbook binder that has slots for recipe cards. Good stuff!

Here's an old family favorite - I grew up on this stuff!! Don't be afraid to experiment with different kinds of cheeses. Some of the best pans I've made of this recipe was when I frantically raided the fridge for whatever kind of cheese I could find. Enjoy!

(Click on the image and it'll blow it up into a larger file that you can then copy over to your desktop)